The asterisk on Friday represented the one year anniversary of me meeting Andy, my first boyfriend and my only online relationship. If you didn't get that, then you're like, so totally dense. Har.
Spring break has not been going extremely well. No productivity, too much sleep, family weirdness, you know the drill. Seeing Maren was nice, though I blew off Brandi to do so. Seeing Emma was nice, but then I felt bad for driving her home following Bartleby to talk to queermike on the telephone.
Hmm, in the past week I've seen Cold Creek Manor, 50 First Dates, Thirteen, Secret Window, Bartleby, and Mystic River. That's… a lot of movies. I'd classify most of them as being okay. Cold Creek Manor was spooky, but still pretty lame. Hmm, yeah, bla.
I can no longer claim I am not a whore, and I still make poor decisions. Someday I will learn… Let's pretend we're bunny rabbits! Then we can commit suicide in amusing manners. Hmm, I feel empty and don't want to tell much. Muffins will solve all!
mmmmm. muffins. when my mom does cook or bake, the results are nummy.
At the end of summer I figured I'd find a relationship immediately at college. No dice. Last fall I decided a “boyfriend by valentine's day” was reasonable. While being in Chad's bed was nice, it was not a boy… Haha. To quote Steph, “nothing matters,” but I'd change it to “this doesn't matter anymore.” I guess that doesn't relate all that much, I just wanted to make Steph feel special.
I'd say my biggest concern right now is how out of place I feel in Brookings. It's going to be an uncomfortable summer I fear. I will find a job and work many hours! I will try to make up for years of crappy friendship to Emma! I will hang out all the people I didn't before! Yeah, that's it! Oh, and I'm going to do lots of cool art and write a lot! That's it!
Talking on the phone for 95 minutes makes my ears hurt. It's kinda odd I talk on the phone with someone from Duluth more than I talk to my mom, Brandi, and Maren combined.
confidential to emma: i first thought vanessa was a cute boy. this was from a distance and she reminded me of someone else.
…you're dreaming of the corpse you really love…