Owie.

Haligh, Haligh, a lie, Haligh, an awful lie. That's a bit of emo freestylin' for ya all. Well, not really at all.

I smell kinda bad I think. I don't like that. I've also been feeling really self conscious about my hair lately. Yeah, I've been really focusing on the deep issues these days. Oh, and started going back to some sites on the internet that I use to haunt, which is not the best thing, but I'm a lot smarter and a lot more realistic these days, so it can't hurt.

Things are going really great. I again have renewed hope and blablabla that kinda stuff. I've finally got a good amount of friends to circulate amongst, and I'm realizing things change. Things change a lot. While I may never again find a fun and comfortable niche of eight people, I have found a lot more diversity than I ever knew before. It was always weird to watch movies where all the characters and their friends were gay, and well, that's kind of what life is like now. It'd be a lot more fitting if I was a lesbian though, ha. Rainer warned me not to become one. I think he had a good point. Last night Jet was pointing out how guys intimidated her, but I didn't. Natalie told me I should consider if that was a compliment or not. Then lots of references were made to groups of girls… and Topher. Wear a dress. Minor threat!

I love Emma, because I tend to ignore her criticism of me less:
emma* says:
you are an amazing mix of good and bad and wonderful and awful.

I think it's a fitting description of all the topher experience. Or was it topher total package? I forget. Someone who I once cared very much about invented that term.

Soon it will be Valentine's day and the “realistic” goal I set for myself of finding someone will have come and gone. It was silly to expect immediate attention? affection? when I got to Duluth. I know well that the best things come when you least expect them.

Amelie is both an example of why I desperately want love and why life should be romantic enough without it. I think photography is going to be a really good class for me, because I decided 30 seconds ago that photography is really romantic.

I like the way things are now, and I can't say I'd really want them to change. I wish Kara wasn't moving to Flordia, but people do what they have to do. Well, okay, there's always room for change. I want to be less awkward. A pedicure would be nice too. And nazis.

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